In a world where we are constantly trying to please others and seek their approval, it can be easy to lose sight of our own needs and boundaries. But as author Lori Deschene wisely said, “If you love yourself, it doesn’t matter if other people don’t like you because you don’t need their approval to feel good about yourself.”
One individual shares their personal journey of learning to prioritize themselves and set boundaries in order to find true happiness. They reflect on a lifetime of people-pleasing, always putting others first at the expense of their own well-being. They recount the struggles of feeling guilty for taking time for themselves and the anxiety of asserting their own needs in social situations.
It wasn’t until a significant moment in their life, when they became a parent, that they realized the importance of enforcing boundaries for their own sake and for the sake of their child. By saying “no” to things that didn’t align with their values and communicating their needs clearly, they found a newfound sense of peace and happiness.
Of course, this journey wasn’t without its challenges. Setting boundaries meant some relationships changed or even ended altogether. The guilt and hurt responses from friends and family weighed heavily on them, but they learned to prioritize their own well-being above seeking approval from others.
Through this process, they also discovered that setting boundaries doesn’t always mean completely cutting off relationships. It can be about adapting the dynamics of relationships to protect your own energy and mental health. By finding a balance between expressing your needs and maintaining positive connections, it is possible to create healthier and happier relationships.
Ultimately, the message is clear: prioritizing yourself and setting boundaries is essential for true happiness. While it may be difficult and even painful at times, the relationships that are meant to thrive will only grow stronger as a result. Your happiness is just as important as anyone else’s, and it is up to you to define and defend your boundaries to create a fulfilling life.